Nouf
I stretched my hands to give back the pictures. I don't want to keep them or look at them anymore. Its non of my business.
Why do i feel like the world just ran out of oxygen.
"Keep them," he says to me with an undeniable smirk. He's enjoying this i can see.
"Why are you showing me these?"
"You, little girl, need to know what you're dragging yourself into." I hit his hands away as he attempts to caress my cheeks.
"I know what I'm dragging myself into, thank you very much." I reply with a clenched jaw. "Bye."
I race the tears to the ladies room. Gladly i reached before any of them would fall. I stared again at the pictures in my hand.
Run run as fast as you can Nouf, just run away.
Even the fairies in my head were nodding.
Breathing in, i close my eyes. You just know them for two weeks or so. This is non of your business. Its just a crush. A minor little crush on.... .... Butti?! I surprised myself for taking that long to understand my own feelings.
I look back down at the pictures. Yes, it bothered me more that he, Butti, was in the pictures more than finding perfect Fares in there. Even the idea that he smoked, and that he would ignore me or think ill of me bothered me more.
But the pictures, i remind myself. The pictures.
I walked back to Butti trying to look as "normal" as i could. He started talking about Turkey, Hagia Sofia Church that was turned into a mosque and a lot of other stuff that gladly did not need my input in. Shrugging, nodding and smiling was enough. Though i could not restrain myself from throwing in a couple of harsh, sarcastic comments. And after what seemed to me a long unbearable walk, we reached to Mado where the rest of the group were sitting.
I took the seat beside Lojain and whispered to her, "His face"
She looked at me suspiciously.
"remember you were asking what i liked about Fares, his face. Only." and I shrugged as i took the menu from the hands of a handsome turkish waiter.
I must say their desserts are amazing. The ice cream, the puddings, the baklava. It just melted your senses away with a rush of delicious tastes that will clear away all your miseries. At that moment i forgot Nathan, the pictures and my crush/hate towards the handsome cousins.
_____________________________________
"You seem to take good care of Nouf" Said Butti's mom carefully when they were alone in her room.
"She's away from her parents for the first time," he replied casually.
"Butti." She said firmly, "Figure out what you're doing. I don't want to get into a complicated matter with this girl, your cousin and my sister."
"Don't worry" he planted a kiss on her forehead. "You'll only hear good news"
He promised his mother without knowing if he could deliver the promise. She is right, i have to put things straight before it gets complicated.....
"Nouf!" Butti called as he knocked on the girls apartments door. "Noouuff!!"
"Enough you'll break the door!!" Shouts Haifa back at her brother. "What do you want from Nouf exactly?" she looks at him with half eye.
"Just call her!"
"She's not here."
"Where is she?!!!" He was clearly running out of patience.
"What happened at the museum... Why did you take her back?"
"Because i like her. okay?! Now where is she?"
"you what?! no butti.. you can't. you see.... shit."
"I know." He said curling his lips. "I'm trying to fix it, where is she?"
"She's with Fares and Lojain.... I sent them to get us a movie to watch because we were trying to set them up i'm sorry i did not know and i ... "
"Where?!"
"Down the road," Haifa felt bad for what Butti might be feeling right now; to have the girl you like pick your brother...
Butti hurried outside to find the store. He felt he was running out of time although few minutes ago he was not thinking of confessing at all. But his heart was pounding and his thoughts were racing. All he could think about was getting Nouf to be his, now, to be sure that she picks him and only him.
"Nouf!" he exclaimed as if he has not seen her in ages. It felt that way. "Come with me."
"Where? We're just buying this and going back home."
"Just a few steps from here, come!" He looked at Lojain, "I'm borrowing her for a few minutes, i'll bring her home"
"No!" said Nouf impatiently, "I said i'm going back home with them."
"jeez, Nouf! Go, he said a few minutes only." Lojain sensed the urge in Butti's voice. She pushed Nouf out then looked at Butti with half eye, "Don't go too far."
"Are you done yet?" Fares addressed Lojain as he sees Nouf walking out the door.
"Nops" she says with fluttering her eye lashes annoyingly and taking her sweet time looking at the DVDs.
"just pick any lame*** romantic movie already!"
"You hurt my feelings if you think i watch Romance," Lojain rolled her eyes, "Nouf can tell you, i watch drama, thriller and horror. The best!"
This was enough to strike an interesting conversation between the two. They talked about their favorite and worse, the scariest and the lamest of them all.
On the other hand, the atmosphere was not quite the same with the other couple. The walked together in silence, mostly because Nouf cut off any attempt of conversation, she did not want to talk to him, know him better because all it seems to do is make her fonder of him. And that is surely out of the plan.
The walk wasn't how Butti planned either, he pictured them talking, laughing and picking on each other as they usually do. She misses her parents, was enough of an explanation to keep him from worrying.
"Here were are" he announced as they reached a park like area covered with lights and snow. "what do you think?"
The place was beauuuutiful to say the least. You could even see the Bosphurus and mountains from here. It looked magical. A perfect place to take your loved ones to.
"its nice, can we go back now?" she said impatiently. Part of her wanted to enjoy this place while the other was eager to run away from Butti, to ignore him and pretend he just never happened.
"Nouf, whats wrong? don't you like the place? i passed by earlier today and i thought i'd bring you, thought you'd love it.."
"I want to go back." Those were the exact words she did not need to hear from him.
"We will. But first, will you hear me for a second?" he said cautiously. Nouf's attitude put him off chart.
" I don't want to listen to you! you keep on dragging me away from the group. just stop it!"
Butti stood there trying to understand. The silence between them filled both their chests with pain. It was merely seconds, but it felt too long. Tying the thoughts in his head, Butti created sense out of what happened. She's upset I take her away from Fares, he falsely comprehended.
"You throw yourself like that at Fares, and you don't know your worth. You deserve someone better! If you open your eyes you might find someone that actually cares about you!!"
"Who? someone like you?" She says sarcastically. "You just said i deserve someone better!"
Her eyes start filling up with tears as she tries to get the pictures out of her purse.
"I do deserve better" she added while handing over the pictures.
Butti's color changed to a different shade of yellow. He looked very pale as he stared at the pictures.
"Where did you get them from?"
"Doesn't matter," she said as she turned to walk back. "let's go back."
"Nouf, listen..."
"No, you listen. You may think all of this is fine because you're used to it, I'm not. Its not fine, its not right and you're not going to convince me otherwise. You'll say people do worse stuff? It doesn't matter to me because i think that this is bad. Just because people have it worse, doesn't make this any better. What is wrong is wrong and i'm convinced. You go have your life your way, and i'll have mine. "
"And i never "threw" myself at anyone" she added looking disgustingly at the photos in his hands then walked away.
Butti looked at the photos in his hands. The photos were of him in parties, bars, concerts etc. Very suspicious photos. But it was not what it looked like. What Nouf did not know was that the all these photos were taken while Butti ran to save Fares.
He walked a couple of meters behind her to make sure she's safe but not to invade her space. He knew the pictures were convincing and he needed her to calm down before explaining everything.
